Blog Number 3

Hey Guys. Ugh I am so mad right now. I feel like all my dreams aren't going to come true and I'm going to end up stuck in my small town with know life and nothing to live for. I hope one day my mom can see this and actually see I'm not faking and see i do need to see a therapist. Any who i need to blow off some anger. My moms Uncle is a professor at Dartmouth and he is freaking moving to Scotland to live and teach for a year. Are you freaking kidding me! I would love to do that but I'm stuck in this small house with my family going crazy and feeling more troubled than ever. Even though i say that i know that its probably better this way. I mean my Uncle earned to be where he is. I just really want to travel and see the world and to be only tide down by love. Plus my Uncle is atheist, which makes me sad. I do believe in God and i think its very sad the consequences he will have to face. Any who it was my dream once to become what he is, a professor and a very humble and smart man well in my cause women. Now don't get me wrong I still want that but right now i seriously just want to leave and to see the world and most of all to find love. I pray to god  he will make this happen but i know i need to make it happen through him, i have to work at it, which i hope i will. I say hope because it seems sometimes i can't trust myself , I'm always scared i will give in to the wrong way like i have before. I know I'm only 13 but in maturity I feel a lot older. I feel like i can handle stuff others my age cant. I know this is a long blog, but it feels good to get it out so I'm going to continue. Anyways lol I hope One day i can look back at my life and have no regrets, which i know those who suffer are rewarded. Every time i here that i realized that I'm fine with the situation I'm in now and even though it may be hard now, later it will help me somehow and for that i thank God. I know i type and talk about how hard my life is but in reality i wouldn't want it any other way, i hope you, reader, will keep that in mind every time i type because no matter how much i complain i appreciate my life and thank god for giving it to me and all though there will be challenges I will pull through because those who suffer, in the end are rewarded. :)  So please know that i am happy with my life even the hard times are pretty hard i understand now that no matter what God is with me and with Him everything is Possible. :)
Love,
Jessica (: XoXoXo