Blog Number 5- Don't Really Know (: (:

Hey Guys! Lol wow! I'm looking back at my last blog and dang! I was seriously emotional hahah mostly negative emotions to, which totally sucks. Haha I'm kind of mad at myself to for cussing, haha i dont like cussing enless I'm super mad Lol Anyways haha I'm typing this early by the way cause I'm suppost to go to my friend house. Haha I Have OCD so i feel like i have to type every day, haha thats why i am typing now even though i don't really know what to say.(: Haha I am pretty anxious though. Lol dont judge when i tell you this but i have nothing else to say so i am saying this. Haha I was on one of my fav. websites and met this guy from Cali. Lol he's 16 turning 17 in seven days. Lol well we texted for like five hours last night. Haha but around one A.M lol my family got fast food and well haha I had a big burger. lmao I usually eat a lot more. I probably sound like a pig but i swear I'm not, hahah my whole family eats a lot. Lol but anyways last weekend i got a new phone, haha and its all touch. Any way lol i stopped texting him for like twenty minutes. haha So long story short i sent him a text saying sorry, didnt mean to reply so long , blah blah,blah. Lol so now I'm finding myself totally wanting him to text. Haha Oh! I forgot to tell you Lol i dont text people, i wait for them to text me. Haha I'm weird but there's a story behind it lol. So now haha I dont know if i should text him and possible turn out to be the annoying thirteen year old,Ohio girl. Lol ugh whatever Haha I'll just wait i think. Haha what would you guys do? Lol got to go for now, but I'll type tomorrow.
Love,
Jessica XoXoXoXo

Blog Number 4

Hey Guys, Lol I feel like cracking right now. Ugh today has been very stressful. Haha First lol my sister lost a $30 library book and i have yet to tell my grandma. I say grandma because its on her library account and i told her i wouldnt loose any. So in long story short i have to take the fall for my little bitch of a sister Becca. Ew Becca, Just thinking about her right now makes me mad. All week she has been disrespectful,hurtful,and rude, especially to my mom,sister and me. I want to slap her in her little bitchy face. Then after all this stuff i get a call from my mom telling me my principal called saying i might have to sit with the seventh graders this year because of my overpopulated school. The bright side to that though is my best friend might sit with me and three other people. For some reason five of us 8th graders do. Ugh FML. seriously how is that going to work out with our periods what will we have to leave class to eat lunch and then come back while our other classmates eat seriously, WTF? Ugh i am so stressed out right now. I just want school to be over with all together. Then ugh i know i so should not be stressing about this but i am...Graduation. Like what am i going to do after it, seriously. I want to travel the world but that means i have to go to school to get a job to get money. Great. I hope though i can just go to photograhpy school and then travel and take pictures, i love taking pictures of the world around me. Sorry by the way I'm kind of a wreck right now Lol but i think I'm done for now hahah im going to go and eat. great more fat. Lol But blog tomorrow maybe. Bye.
Love,
Jessica XoXoXoXo

Blog Number 3

Hey Guys. Ugh I am so mad right now. I feel like all my dreams aren't going to come true and I'm going to end up stuck in my small town with know life and nothing to live for. I hope one day my mom can see this and actually see I'm not faking and see i do need to see a therapist. Any who i need to blow off some anger. My moms Uncle is a professor at Dartmouth and he is freaking moving to Scotland to live and teach for a year. Are you freaking kidding me! I would love to do that but I'm stuck in this small house with my family going crazy and feeling more troubled than ever. Even though i say that i know that its probably better this way. I mean my Uncle earned to be where he is. I just really want to travel and see the world and to be only tide down by love. Plus my Uncle is atheist, which makes me sad. I do believe in God and i think its very sad the consequences he will have to face. Any who it was my dream once to become what he is, a professor and a very humble and smart man well in my cause women. Now don't get me wrong I still want that but right now i seriously just want to leave and to see the world and most of all to find love. I pray to god  he will make this happen but i know i need to make it happen through him, i have to work at it, which i hope i will. I say hope because it seems sometimes i can't trust myself , I'm always scared i will give in to the wrong way like i have before. I know I'm only 13 but in maturity I feel a lot older. I feel like i can handle stuff others my age cant. I know this is a long blog, but it feels good to get it out so I'm going to continue. Anyways lol I hope One day i can look back at my life and have no regrets, which i know those who suffer are rewarded. Every time i here that i realized that I'm fine with the situation I'm in now and even though it may be hard now, later it will help me somehow and for that i thank God. I know i type and talk about how hard my life is but in reality i wouldn't want it any other way, i hope you, reader, will keep that in mind every time i type because no matter how much i complain i appreciate my life and thank god for giving it to me and all though there will be challenges I will pull through because those who suffer, in the end are rewarded. :)  So please know that i am happy with my life even the hard times are pretty hard i understand now that no matter what God is with me and with Him everything is Possible. :)
Love,
Jessica (: XoXoXo

Blog Number 2

Hey Guys It's me again. (: Today I''m suppost to go shopping with my mom and sisters for school.Ugh School just thinking about it makes me gag! Lol School starts here on the August 23. Anywho Right now though my mom is cleaning......Which isnt a really good thing. Haha She is usually nice and sweet and the best mom. Haha but when she is cleaning I think she gets stressed out and gets angry, and when she gets mad then we are all in a bad mood :/ Plus my little sister isn't making the situation any better:/ She is 11 and keeps nagging my mom :/ She knows better too and so now i seriously want to hit her. Lol But i think because My nephew is here her stress will go down a little bit either that or it will go up really High. Haha My mom is always paying attention to my Nephew. He is ten months old and well i dont know i guess you could call me jealous but i mean come on put yourself in my shoes, Haha I'm in my teen years, Im a girl struggling with emotional stuff, and i feel like my mom never pays attention to me anymore. Like the other Day i died my  hair and it looked like the best i ever had and my said it looked cute when it wasnt even done but then was it was all she did was play with Saige (Nephew) Don't get me wrong I Love my mom, but sometimes i just wish it was like Before i moved to my dads, I use to tell my mom everything and she was my best friend. Then i got lice and had to move with my dad for four years and we kind of just grew apart which makes me want to cry. I wont though i rarely ever cry and if i do i hide it from everyone i hate to show any negative emotion and i hate being around negative emotion. Well I got to go for now Haha i have to go get ready but I'll try to type tomorrow, Bye Guys!
Love,
Jessica (: (: (: (:

First Blog (:

Hey Guys! I'm Jessica :) I am A VERY self conscious Girl. I'm 13 and I go to a school where Everyone is either fat or super skinny and well Im in between so I do it out of bad habit to see myself as fat. My life is very complicated for me. I know what i want but i dont know how to get it. I Hold way to much in and I fantasize about being Cristiano Ronaldo's girlfriend....yay I'm a sad story lol Thats why I'm doing this.I'm trying to perserve some of my sanity haha. So far my life has been hard for me :/ But Thats a Long Long Story, haha and Im not trying to type it all right now lol maybe another time (: Haha Anyways I have to go my Annoying little sister is flipping out on me to get off this Lap Top. Oh and One more thing I swear to never Lie on here, Haha I'm a bad liar and for once i want to be conpletely Honest. Well This Is it for now but I'll try to be Back on tomorrow (: Oh and I hope Blogger is ready for Me! (: